A LITTLE SNAP ON THE WRIST

       Do you sometimes (or often) say disparaging things about yourself, to yourself? 

       You know, you whack your shoulder against the door frame as you walk through it and say, "What a klutz".

        You pass a mirror and think, "Lookin' a little haggy today".

         A common word in a crossword puzzle that you should know just won't come to you and your response is "Better resign from Mensa, dummy".

        We all say such things to ourselves from time to time.  If someone said it to us we'd be highly offended, but we don't seem to mind insulting ourselves.  It sounds harmless, but our brain - that literal little guy that takes it all as gospel - doesn't process it as harmless.  If it's repeated often enough our brain perceives it to be true.  Like a little robot, it doesn't get sarcasm.

       So how do we train ourselves to stop this self- belittlement?  I read an article somewhere (can't remember where.  "Way to go mental midget").  See, it's a hard habit to break.  Anyway, the writer of the article suggested wearing a rubber band around your wrist and snapping it every time you have such thoughts.  Self-applied behavior modification.  

       If you're someone who doesn't talk down to themselves, wow!  Good for you.  For the rest of us, this might be a great experiment.  If it works on self-deprecation there is no limit to the possibilities.  Stop smoking.  Swear off donuts.  Don't buy that dress you can't afford.   It opens up a whole other world!

DO YOU FEAR BEING THINNER?

Forgive us, we're still struggling to get back to the idea of posting regularly, so with that in mind we're re-posting one of our more popular columns.

So, do you fear being thinner?

I'm sure that many of us who have struggled to lose weight think that is a supremely stupid question, but let's think about it for a moment.

Most human behavior is a quest to satisfy some inner – and usually unrealized – desire. In other words, we wouldn't do it if we weren't, consciously or unconsciously, getting something out of it.

Consider people who go from one abusive relationship to another. Why would they do this? Perhaps because it satisfies some inner need to be punished for a real or imagined sin. How often do you hear one of them say, “It was my fault. I deserved it”. NOBODY deserves it. (My opinion.)

The same theory often applies to those who are overweight. They are well aware that they are harming their bodies – and quite possibly shortening their lives – by carrying around those excess pounds, but they seem unable to correct the situation. Maybe they've found a reason. Is it genetic? A glandular problem? Lack of support from family members? Or is it something else?

What are they getting out of being overweight? Well, for one thing, it gives them an excuse for failing, for being depressed and then indulging that old pleasure center in the brain that is demanding a couple of Snicker's Bars. People don't expect as much from you when you're fat, so it takes some of the pressure off. You don't have to think as much about what you're eating. You just eat what you want, and usually what you want is something quick and easy and plentiful – like fast food and bags of snacks.

Being slender and maintaining a healthy weight is a lot more work than just eating mindlessly. The payoff is a healthy, longer life that is living – not just existing. The payoff is being there for your loved ones and feeling great every day. The payoff is being grateful for the wonderful body you have been given and loving life.

Pretty good payoff, huh?

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HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

                                    Valentine wishes from Robin and Doris at Over 40? So What!