Once upon a time there was a quite chubby little girl named Goldilocks. Goldilocks had the unfortunate habit of wandering away from home in search of cream puffs. One day while on her puffy quest she became lost in the woods. She was crying and hungry and trying to find her way home when she came upon a charming cottage. "Maybe they will have some cream puffs", she thought. She knocked on the door but there was no answer, so she pushed the door open and went in.
She was very tired from her wandering. There were three chairs in the room. A great big one, a middle sized one and an itty bitty one. She tried out the itty bitty one, but it was too small. Then she tried out the middle sized one, but it also was too small. But the great big one was just right.
She sat in the great big chair and noticed that there were three cream puffs on the table. A great big one, a middle sized one and an itty bitty one. First she ate the itty bitty one, but that was not enough, so then she ate the middle sized one. This wasn't enough either, so she ate the great big one.
Now even Goldilocks was stuffed, so she wandered into the bedroom and there were three beds. A great big one, a middle sized one and an itty bitty one. Remembering past experiences, she opted for the great big one right away and fell fast asleep.
Well, who should come home to their little cottage but three bears. A great big one, a middle sized one and an itty bitty one. They had been out for a walk before eating their dessert and were looking forward to their cream puffs.
"Look", cried the itty bitty bear," my cream puff is all gone" . "Look" said the middle sized bear, "mine is gone too". The great big bear growled, "Who ate our cream puffs?"
They looked in the bedroom and there, in the great big bed, they found Goldilocks, with cream still on her face.
So they ate her instead.
The moral of this story: If you're going to steal cream puffs from bears, make sure you have a get-away car handy and, for Pete's sake, don't take a nap first.